So Long, and Thanks for All The Flesh

Ken asked me to say a few words before I left for the land of monogamous sex, morning breath and a suitable "+1" for weddings, bar mitzvahs and posting bail bonds. It's been a blast, y'all. Our commenters and lurkers are by far the most clever, sexy, deviant, lascivious bunch of drunks God ever brought together in this lifetime, and your questions were astounding - folks, we just couldn't make this shit UP. Here's to undie stealers, horny dads, blow job queens, ass-in-jeans fetishists (I'm looking at you, K) lipstick lezzies and everlasting hard ons - batteries not included.
I'll miss the good 'ol days of unwrapping that special package, not knowing what was underneath (who knew every Friday/Saturday night could be like CHRISTMAS?!?) I'll miss the morning walk of shame, my spiked stilettos getting stuck in every sidewalk crack and subway grate, my sad bunny ears crumpled and dirty, my cotton tail falling off around State St. as I rushed to catch the bus Monday morning for work. I'll miss the drunken debauchery of my local watering hole where - with just a quick twitch of my nose (and 9 Kamikaze shots) I could witness the magical transformation of a "2" at 10PM to a "10" at 2AM. That is what living life is all about, people!!!
Ken, never one to throw in the towel (or hand lotion, for that matter), has found a new partner in crime who I'm certain will take you on a journey so dirty, so naughty, so fraught with sexual tension and lubrication you may just explode. Just be sure to pack your rubbers and a change of underwear and I promise, you'll be fine.
Lots of love and happy humping,
Ariel