Ice Breaker

At the end of a first date, I find this very helpful to whip out when there's a lull in the conversation or it's unclear to your gentleman caller what he's supposed to do next. However, I do have one complaint: do you see the puny size of those jars?!? How the hell am I supposed to work with that?!? This is America, man. Bigger. Better. I don't want the kids menu, I want you to SuperSize me. So, if I'm going to continue using your product, I better look like this: