in a sea of Wanna-Bes, Shatner Has Been

Folks, you may recall earlier how Ken was lulled senseless by Juliette Lewis's siren songs. Or maybe it was that divine bottom. Anyway, this alarming trend in LA County seems to have no signs of abatement--Minnie Driver and Robert Downey Jr. have just released albums, Jada Pinkett Smith opened for Brittney Spears, and who's the asshole who told Jennifer Love Hewitt she could sing?!?

But that's not the point of this rant. The point is, in a world of model/actor/singers, Captain Kirk is the dude that really deserves to rock out. At the height of his Trekkie career, y'know, back in the day before computers were invented and your parents were still screwing other people, William Shatner came out with, get this, a **spoken word** album called "The Transformed Man." It was hysterical, it was campy, but what's so friggin cool is that he did it first, before anyone else. He beat all the stoopid "Beam me up, Scotty" impersonators to the punch.

Now here he is, decades later, doing it again. And you know what? I'm gonna buy it. And, if you've been good little boys and girls, you might just find this special CD under your tree this year. Next to the re-release of Rick Dees' "Disco Duck."